I've gone into hiding for a while. I've deleted my Facebook account, my twitter, and ravaged the list of blogs I followed. I got released from primary. Kind of happy about it. I was spending too much time looking into everyone else's lives and not working on mine. I have been struggling with my faith, and after making the grueling realization that I've got a lot of repenting to do, I now hide while I seek.
I've been doing much better this past month, with the exception of a few days. I have been diligent with journaling. I keep 2 and I am working on a third. My personal Journal, a journal that I record Paxton's milestones and anecdotes in, and a gratitude journal. I also have picked up my scriptures a few times. I have not read them regularly since the hubster and I came to be. But my longest absence..... six months, give or take. Not one jot or tittle. I'm as astounded as you are.
Sunday, I managed to feel the spirit. Not at church- in my own home. Lately I have really enjoyed reading The Ensign (a monthly magazine that my church publishes) and on sunday, I happened to come across the First Presidency message written by Dieter F. Uchtdorf (a counselor in the Leadership of my church) about being committed to the gospel, and it really hit home.
I have a cousin Catania who I really look up to (she doesn't even know it. As matter of fact, I'm pretty sure she un-friended me on Facebook because she forgot who I was. Or, She just doesn't like me) She has been through hell and back, and yet has every quality I wish I had. I stumbled upon her spiritual blog and I find myself really inspired by her. I want to be that commited.
Pax, my 5 month old son, is currently the love of my life(figuratively speaking). He has all of a sudden become really endearing. His personality blows me away. This week we discovered that:
a: he loves sitting and playing in garbage
b: he loves Laying and playing with garbage.
I think christmas will be a breeze this year.