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Showing posts from 2013

Tying up "loose ends"

Warm baths and the end of the year seem to bring out the best in me.
I sat there in my tub, thinking about the things I'd like to change about myself in the new year.
Surprisingly, my weight was not one of them.

I pondered my life thus far, and if I knew i had the rest of this year to live, that i'd spend my time enjoying the mundane things of life, and to let go of my pride.

mainly, make apologies that I need to make. As I sit here typing, I am thinking of at least more people i need to address, and I hope this gets to all of them (some I am not in contact with). one thing I know about myself but others may not know, is that i have the darndest time with apologies. I cannot for the life of me make a half-assed one. It has to be sincere, in order for me to do it.
The hard thing about that is, i have to feel like i did something wrong in order to make it.
Unintentionally hurting some feelings is THE HARDEST thing to apologize for. And saying "i'm sorry you got your fee…

All things testify of Christ

I've been spending a lot of time at home lately. a 4 week old baby has me stuck to the couch. As much as I hate to admit it, i watch a lot of netflix. We don't have cable, and we don't really watch regular tv. I normally don't follow any TV series unless I'm mega bored. I have the tendency to get hooked on a series if it's really good, and i'l watch an entire season in an entire day. It happened with grey's anatomy, the vampire diaries, how i met your mother, and.... i can't remember what others I've watched in it's entirety. This weekend My children and I were sick. Pax had a fever and i had a runny nose & sore throat, and the baby had been a little congested.  I got pretty sick of watching Phineas & ferb (paxton's new fave) and decided to start a new interest in a tv series. I tried pretty little liars for a few episodes, but eventually lost interest. I started New girl- which was really funny, but I also lost interest. Then i …

Redeeming birth: Emberlee's birth story

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I have to get this out of my head now while it is still fresh in my memory.

I had been having contractions every day for a week, for only about 4 hours in the evening. They were not intense, but not Braxton hicks contractions, and each day that passed, the more intense and close together they were. Saturday night, a big storm rolled in and my contractions changed again. They got closer together, MUCH closer together and each one seemed to start off where the previous had peaked. I had about 10 contractions in about 30 minutes, so I let my midwife know I was in labor, and that I would call her when things got more intense. It was about 9pm that my contractions stopped, so I went to bed.
Sunday was pretty uneventful. I went to church and took the sacrament, but I just could not get comfortable and my back started to hurt pretty bad, so I had John take me home to rest right after the sacrament was passed. We had lunch with the family and hung out watching nacho liner and having fun. I st…

Lessons learned

I did it. I officially withdrew from beauty school.

It's been a difficult decision, but I feel so much lighter. I've decided to eliminate the beauty world from my life. The beauty blog, my twitter account, the YouTube channel..... Everything.

I go through this re-assessment phase pretty often. Usually once a year.

While my lack of consistency and inability to see things through to the end really annoy me (& John. Probably more him than me) I walk away from this experience and all others, grateful and feeling enriched.

I have learned so much over the year. I have learned more about myself than I did about hair, skin,& nails .

1. I'm content with my weaknesses. I've stopped self-loathing because I couldn't seem to do anything right ( the things I thought I should be doing & good at) and now I just accept it because it makes me feel better about me.

2. I love everything about knowledge and learning. I'm a sponge and I am not content with dedicatin…

25 weeks with Emberlee

I'm starting to warm up to the idea that I have another baby to push out in 3ish months. (25 weeks along right now). Parts of me are concerned, and all the rest just want to get it over with.
I guess hitting 25 weeks is magical, because this weekend and especially right now, I feel as uncomfortable as I was the last week of pregnancy with pax. Between varicose veins on my private parts and my relaxin- happy pubic bone and hips... I am in a lot of pain, and it is difficult to sit on the toilet to do what I gotta do. I am hoping an adjustment and some exercise will relieve some of the aching. But today, it's a little overwhelming. Pregnancy has always been hard on me emotionally.

Our food has been in coolers with ice since Thursday night. I went to the freezer to start preparing dinner, and everything had been completely defrosted. So we waited another hour or so to see if the door had been left open or if there was an actual problem. The fridge was still not cooling. We u…

Eating Machine and a breakfast recipe

I cannot seem to stop eating at this stage in pregnancy. I'm just grateful I've avoided the 20 week kidney infection.

I like to make casseroles for breakfast lately. They are quick and are a fantastic way to incorporate fruit and veggies from the moment you wake up.

This morning I modified a recipe I found on Pinterest. It's a baked oatmeal casserole, and I turned it sugar and dairy free. Here is the base recipe :

Dry ingredients:
2 C oats
1/3 C coconut sugar ( or your fave sugar alt.)
1 t baking powder
1 t cinnamon

Wet ingredients :
1 egg
2 C coconut milk ( or your fave milk alt.)
3 T melted earth balance soy free spread ( you can also use coconut oil, but it solidifies the second it touches that cold milk and it defeats the purpose of melting it beforehand.
1t fave extract ( almond and vanilla are great, coconut would be yummy too)

Add in's:
You can put whatever you want in this casserole. Fresh or frozen fruit, nuts, dried fruit, sweet potato, or even peanut but…

Part of me

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Most people who know me, know that I was raised in Florida.
I was born in Salt lake city, Utah and my parents moved me and my siblings to Tampa six months past my 1st birthday.

I get my share of homesickness when I realize how blessed my life was, just being there. And there are specific things I miss other than my crazy, Florida cracker family.

 I miss sitting under a giant oak tree and watching the spanish moss sway in the wind.


I miss the east-coast sunrises. it's like standing on the edge of the world and watching God create light for the first time.

I miss the constant noise. the bugs and birds and frogs join together in a chorus so loud it's practically deafening.

I miss the smell of the air before a thunderstorm. it smells like water straight from the hose, which for some reason is incredibly comforting.

I miss how far away everything is. I used to enjoy driving. Taking the back roads was more of a pleasure than taking the freeway. Everyday was a beautiful day. The ti…

My Big boy

I'm kind of mad that this new computer has nowhere for a memory card. Can't upload any pictures from my brand new camera.

Anyway, I haven't written down any of paxton's milestones since he was about 18 months, and seeing that he'll be 2 in 2 weeks, I've got some catching up I need to do.

The main thing that has exploded lately has been his vocabulary. he is really starting to communicate effectively. There are some times when i have to really think about what he is saying or asking for, and i just can't identify what it is. Today I discovered the main word that was majorly stumping me.
He used to say it over and over again, whine for it, scream it at the top of his lungs at the grocery store. The word is "puship" which apparently means fruit. "mee-as" means banana, and "busgh" means peanut butter. We are working on those. He'll say "chicken" if he wants any type of meat, and this morning he asked for sausage by na…